Recently a friend of mine asked me why I didn’t write posts about Thai bar girls and the sex scene to increase traffic on my blog. Everyone else does!
The answer was short and simple, yet the explanation slightly longer.
In short, quite frankly, it’s boring. The subject matter of bar girls has been discussed into oblivion on hundreds of other websites.
Blog and forum owners happily let people thrash out misogynistic musings on their sites as link-bait to drive traffic. But this isn’t what I set up my blog to do. And the reality is that Thailand is so much more than the bar scene.
It is part of it, but I think many expats would agree that the longer you live here the more insignificant it becomes.
I don't want to waste time discussing questions like, “Can bar girls ever be faithful”? or “Are bar girls getting fatter?” Or discussing stories of men who feel aggrieved at having struck up a relationship with a bar girl and spent tons of money, only for her to move on to a new “handsome man”.
I don't enjoy degrading people, either. I don't enjoy talking about women as if they are inhuman, as if they are objects to be sexually exploited. I have a daughter, a mother, and a wife…Go figure.
Don't get me wrong: I have no problem with casual sex. I am not a prude. What consenting adults do together is up to them. Neither do I pretend that men can stop mentally objectifying women. It's nature. Men are designed to see women as potential mates, and vice versa.
But we do have moral agency. We are capable of respect, of understanding, of compassion, of kindness.
And for all the hatred and dehumanizing comments on forums and blogs, people would do well to remember that these girls are daughters, sisters and mothers, and at one time children with dreams and aspirations – just like our own children.
The point of this article about bar girls is to go beyond the heavy make-up and high heels and look at the industry from the ground up. To strip naked (no pun intended) the circumstances that have resulted in so many women entering the industry and ultimately being dehumanized by punters and society at large.
Bar girls in Ao Nang
Life Before the Bar
Firstly, let’s look at the demographic of the average Thai prostitute.
A sub-standard school education, usually incomplete.
Married young in a rural village – usually in the North or North East somewhere – and partnered by her family with an ill-suited young man.
The husband usually tires of the novelty of marriage quite quickly and swaps puppy love for boozing, gambling and womanizing (or at least 2 or the 3) like his father did, and his father before that.
Boy leaves girl with one or two kids. Girl receives no social security money from the state and no child maintenance from the father of her children.
So, pressure falls on the girl to find work to support the children and her aging parents, who, by the way, she has already disappointed by having a failed marriage, and further upset by now being a single mother and scarring the face of family pride.
Girl then becomes determined to provide her children with a better life, and to elevate the face of her family in the village.
Girl hears from another girl (friend, “cousin”) that working in a bar in Bangkok, or on one of the popular tourist islands, is the best way to make fast money. The added bonus is that she can meet a rich foreign boyfriend who will be prepared to take on her kids and support her parents (or a story very similar to this).
Due to her lack of education, the girl then weighs up the other options as a cleaner, rice farmer or factory worker, in which she faces long, boring hours of work that will never provide enough money to make her children’s/parent’s lives any better than their current situation.
Essentially it's stay dirt poor or take a risk.
So, girl migrates to the city/island to start her covert initiation into the world of prostitution; most likely with very little idea what it entails and what she's letting herself in for.
*At this point it should be noted that some (not all) girls arrive at bars in debt to middlemen who arrange travel and accommodation from their province. So even if the girl wants to leave after arrival, she will have to work off that debt first.
This is a devious way to keep the recruitment numbers high and the deserters low. I mean, once you've sold your body a few times the deed is done; it's pointless returning to disappoint your parents with the news that you didn't make it in the “big city” after all. Once you've crossed the line, you might as well try and make it work, right?
Cultural & Social Obligations
Having travelled to the North and North East of Thailand many times and seen the lack of opportunity and pressures of money (debt) and “keeping face” that young girls grow up with, when I see a girl standing outside a bar on the street, no matter how sexy she is trying to act, I find it impossible to see her as anything other than a victim of circumstance, of a system that in many ways socially engineers and steers women towards prostitution.
What I see in the bar is not a piece of meat to be exploited, but a girl that grew up believing that one day, when she finishes school, she will find a respectable job (or start a business) and be able to make her parents proud. If you live in Thailand you'll know that this is very much the Thai dream.
I don’t see a girl who grew up aspiring to be a dirty old man’s fantasy, or a girl who aspired to regularly sleep with men she doesn't find attractive.
I see a girl who naively bought into the idea that her teenage husband would stay faithful and do his best to always support her and their kids, and was victim of the antiquated cultural requirement that a girl must marry the first seemingly decent boy her parents catch her flirting with.
I see a girl who felt that she had to sell her soul for the bigger picture, to go against the morals she was brought up in an attempt to better the future of her family.
I see a girl who has sacrificed her own happiness, and potentially her mental stability, for the benefit of her family. No one should ever have to do that.
And then I see a plethora or foreign men coming to exploit, not help, as they may proclaim, the unfortunate situation of a woman failed by a society that does not provide social welfare or adult education programs for single mothers, and does not hold men in the slightest bit accountable for their offspring.
Is it Really a True “Choice”?
No doubt someone will surf on through here and tell me that many bar girls do the job by choice, making that self-serving observation that “she doesn't have to do it if she doesn't want to”.
But as I have covered, the cultural pressures and limited choice of economic progression force the hand into the fire. So the word “choice” becomes an ambiguous one at best.
When you debate this issue and use the word “choice” as your key defense, do you mean the same “choices” (quote on quote) that you would accept for your kids or close friends? I very much doubt it.
If the alternative career paths wouldn't provide an acceptable level of living for our children, then how can we so flippantly use the word “choice” as a justification for what these girls do?
Of course, there will always be a handful of women in Thailand who left a decent career to make more money in the sex industry; every one seems to have an anecdotal story in this regard. But we know this isn't the norm; it's not a common occurence.
The Reality Behind The Heels & Smiles
I won’t lie. My eyes danced when I first saw the bright lights, high heels, elegance and youthful beauty of the girls in the go-go bars.
It really didn’t compute that the hostesses in the bars were actually no different to the hookers lurking in the back streets of Soho, London. I couldn't see any hollow-eyed druggies with greasy hair, and there were no bad attitudes looking for the quickest transaction possible.
This all looked so friendly and welcoming.
And it's this sugar-coated version of prostitution that makes it easier to ignore the truth.
However, the more I learnt about the industry behind the scenes – the social-economic structure of the country, the systematic oppression of the lower classes, and rural prejudice – the easier it became to see the emptiness behind the smiles and gracious gestures.
Strangely, men seem to get so caught up in the ego trip of being a “handsome man” that they neglect to notice that these bar girls are young Thai women, and by preference probably don't actually fancy western men.
In fact, the majority of young Thai women are into teenage Korean pop stars and Channel 7/Channel 3 Thai movie stars.
Yet being from the social underclass, divorced/separated (more often than not with kids) prior to the bar, the only Thai men they have access to on a serious relationship level are also from that social underclass.
These are low-income earning men that will (generally) resemble similar characteristics to the inadequate man they were once married to. As we know, gambling, alcoholism and domestic abuse is rife in such economic settings.
Again, consider that word “choice”.
Moreover, once a Thai girl has been in the bar, she will struggle to get a Thai boyfriend at all. Therefore, once in the bar, a westerner/foreigner isn’t a choice, he is the only option.
If you know an iota about Thai culture, you'll know that a girl who works, or has worked, in a farang-style beer bar will struggle to earn the respect of other Thais going forward. Thais, unfortunately, tend to be able to tell working girls / ex-working girls simply by their mannerisms and by asking a few strategic questions.
Of course, few will refer to her as a prostitute. In fact, the word prostitute is seldom used, out of politeness.Two of the more preferred terms are “Poo ying gaan koon” (lady working at night) or “Poo ying haa gin” (lady looking/finding (something) to eat).
A girl who has worked in the bar, regardless of whether she bags a rich farang or not, will suffer a lifetime of gossip and stares from the village folk, not to mention the standard whispers and looks most Thai women endure when they have a foreign boyfriend.
What's strange is that Thailand has an abundance of what one might refer to as average, middle-class single women – university educated and hardworking. Yet many foreign men choose to hang around in the bar scene paying for sex, and end up with a partner from that scene. They then wonder why it all goes belly up.
Not so long ago a friend of mine was in town and he wanted to walk down the infamous bar-laden Soi Nana in Bangkok.
We paced the cesspit of hawkers, child and amputee beggars, ladyboy and female street hookers and plethora of foreign men.
Rather than thinking, “Wow look at all these hot women”, I thought, “Man, this must be one of the most soulless places on the planet, one that exists for one reason only: for the desperate to feed off the desperate”.
Maybe it's just me.
Bar Girls Want the Same Things We Do
A Thai bar girl isn’t a nymphomaniac seeking a life of endless sexual encounters (though I'm sure someone will anecdotally comment that “I met this girl once….”) as many expats and forum lemmings would have you believe.
No, she is seeking a guy to take her off the lowest run of the ladder and elevate her and her family’s status to heights that simply wouldn’t be possible trying to run the capitalist gauntlet from her current standpoint.
She, like every other human being, wants to be loved, respected and valued.
And this is the one thing guys that frequently pursue encounters with bar girls can’t face up to: That underneath all the makeup and forced sexual suggestion is a girl who wants to be loved. Yet she acts like a woman who can’t be broken.
I think Bob Dylan put it best when he sung:
“She takes just like a woman, yes, she does
She makes love just like a woman, yes, she does
And she aches just like a woman
But she breaks just like a little girl”
And before someone comes at me with a “you're victimizing women by treating them like children” comment, the above lyrics can be applied to anyone in a vulnerable place in life.
The reason guys hate to be reminded of the human side of a bar girl is because it would take the “She loves it!” shine off of the conquest.
Imagining that one of those girls could be your own sister or daughter brings the conscience into play. It makes guys realize that these girls have feelings and emotions beyond the fantasy of the delirious male ego that believes these girls are more than happy to be commodified for sex.
Becoming a full-time bargirl takes conditioning.
Just look at the face of a new addition to a bar, and then return two months later to see her stripped of all that might have been sacred. I have seen it with my own eyes….
I will never forget one very timid girl, who looked like a rabbit in headlights on arriving at her new place of work. Her “cousin” had invited her to take up a position as a “waitress”.
It took her weeks to be conditioned to “go with a customer”. I know this because the bar boss was an acquaintance of mine for a while.
Three months later my travels took me away from the island, and as my taxi passed the bar on the way to Samui airport, she was swinging on the dance pole, hair extensions, knee high boots and calling out to men walking by. The transformation was quite something, but sad all the same.
The way men generally discuss these girls is as if they were “born to do it”. Again, this is a self-preserving attempt to separate their actions from the cause.
Perhaps some do take to it like a duck to water, but the majority have to be broken in, so to speak, and are helped along by the Mama Sang and other working girls.
The Irony of Similarity Between Bargirl & Customer
Ironically, the average sex-tourist isn’t so far removed from his subject.
He may talk a good conquest to his pals, but secretly he longs to be admired as a man, to be loved, to be held, to be respected and noticed by women; things life may have failed to ever present amicably, or in a way that would be considered “normal” to other guys.
So he chooses to pay, which may be the only avenue he has to getting close to what he really wants from a woman. There's nothing wrong with that, if the transaction is consensual, right?
Yet all too often in this transactional realm, the man falls foul to the strategic lies of a seasoned player.
He gets too involved. The lines get blurred. He forgets it is a financial agreement and not a real romance and ends up losing not just his integrity but a considerable financial investment.
His bitterness at being “played” then results in misogynistic behavior, and the need for revenge through the physical and verbal degradation of Thai women.
Psychological Impact, Alcoholism, Drug Abuse
Can a bar girl have a normal relationship after the bar?
Of course it's possible, and I am sure there are many happy relationships that have lasted the distance between bar girls and westerners.
The amount of foreigners maintaining contact with bargirls and sending money to them once they return home is testament to the fact that in many cases the needy find the needy on common ground.
She admires and he complies, she “takes care of him” and he “takes care” (financially) of her beyond the bar. The success rate, however, comes into question when reading all the negative stories foreigners post online.
On the other hand, it should be considered that sleeping with men twice/thrice their age, and men they generally have no physical attraction to, week in week out, will take its toll on the majority of girls.
No doubt that in some cases there is psychological damage, similar to that experienced by victims of sexual abuse, albeit the bargirl act is consensual and transactional.
Therefore, it isn’t surprising that so many girls experience breakdowns and turn to drugs and alcoholism and end up in refuges. The reality is that post the bar, most struggle to ever have a normal, loving relationship.
The lucky few are able to settle for a retired expat who is prepared to pay the bills in return for regular thrills. True love really isn’t an option for most bargirls, period. But then what is true love, anyway?
When you hit the bars on a Saturday night, I wouldn't blame you for thinking the last paragraph regarding drug and alcohol abuse and refuges is a little far fetched. I would have thought so many years ago.
Until I taught martial arts at a women’s refuge in Bangkok, that is.
I met well over 50 women there who were victims of bars. Those that had broken down psychologically, those who experienced family abandonment when their parents found out (or rather when the friends and other villagers found out what they already knew), and perhaps most disturbingly, those who got pregnant after having been raped by pimps/facilitators, bar owners or customers.
I was shocked by the stories.
When I tell the “It’s a choice” guys about the refuge, they simple can’t believe it, either.
Neither can they believe that many girls are bought and pimped, and in fact can’t leave the bar until the debt is paid in full. Admittedly this is getting rarer, but it still happens in the very poorest of rural areas.
For these girls, the fewer customers you go with the more your rent accumulates on top of the money that was paid for you to secure the job in the first place.
Of course, not every case fits this template, and there are many variations in circumstance. But the point is that the majority of bar migrations aren't fully transparent, and the majority of girls, however they may seem now, would have been largely ignorant to the life that would become them.
In Conclusion
Three thousand words in and I hope you may now understand why I do not glamorize the bar scene on my blog.
My blog isn’t a platform to speak about these girls as toys to be played with and treated with contempt.
My blog is not a corner of the web that will degrade, marginalize, or spread hatred.
A Thai bar girl is a woman, just like your mother, sister, daughter, girlfriend or wife.
The key difference between the dearly loved women in your life and a bar girl is an education and a level playing field of opportunity, which amounts to nothing more than the lottery that is birth.
I want to end by playing you Mae Sai by the group Carabou.
The song is about a girl from the North who goes away to become a prostitute to make money for her parents. She gets hooked on drugs and by the time she returns her mother is dead.
The video has English subs, so don't worry if you don't speak Thai.
Makes you think, huh?
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Gerdy says
http://www.stickmanbangkok.com/reader/reader263.html
Oct 12, 2012 at 1:28 am
TheThailandLife says
If she never asks for money and genuinely does want a "normal" relationship, but used to be a freelancer, it won't be long before you realise this simply through pieces of the puzzle that don't make sense. But then if she's a genuine girl with a heart of gold and good intentions toward you, and you love her, would you care. Up to you.
Regardless of what people like Stickman might purport, this notion that women who work at night spend their lives concealing what they do is complete rubbish. Thai people know, their home town knows, everyone knows. It is only the "stupid farang" who never bothers to learn a snippit of the language who doesn't. However, most Thais don't refer to the girls as "prostitutes" because this word is like using the 'c" word in English. And so they use phrasing. For example, when I speak with the owner of the cafe in my local area, she'll tell me stories about the girls working "night", referring to them as "poo ying glang koon" (ladies working at night). Thais know prostitutes a mile off from how they speak, act and from their daily movements. They pity them, and the girls don't deny what they do, yet don't talk about it openly. The Thai men drinking in the soi, on the other hand, refer to the women as "poo ying haa gin" when they strut past in heels and minis off to work, which means a woman looking for something to eat (men).
I don't want to be ageist or offensive here, but come on. If a hot, young girl is coming onto you, showing overt interest in public and going to extensive lengths to establish a connection with you, and you're almost twice her age, or looks-wise she is generally way out of your league, then have a bit of common sense. Perhaps, just maybe, she's seeing you as a target more than the potential love of her life.
As for Stickman's blog; well, most of us who've been here a fair few years know that it's sensationalist, fabricated bull**** that all reads with one agenda, and that is to make out that every Thai woman is a secret whore with a monetary agenda. Anyone who writes and reads a lot can tell a large majority of those stories are written by the same person; it's very transparent. Behind that screen is a bitter man with a hateful agenda.
Oct 12, 2012 at 11:19 am
Random John says
And the other girl who wanted to sleep with him - if he was young and good looking and she was "half old, half ugly" as he described, perhaps she was just happy to get an opportunity to stay with a guy like that. Perhaps she was lonely and saw that he was lonely too. Many girls actually do enjoy having sex with young good looking guys. Or maybe she was really just a prostitute trying to make a buck, so what's wrong with that? He didn't have to take her to his room if he didn't want to.
If anything, this story goes to demonstrate how a guy can be stupid enough to set himself up, get brokenhearted and become totally nuts (barfighting, flushing money in the toilet to take revenge on a completely unrelated person!). Come on, he would blame the "money grabbing Thai girls" just to have anyone to blame but himself.
Oct 12, 2012 at 7:44 pm
TheThailandLife says
Oct 13, 2012 at 6:41 pm
Random John says
The money part is just some icing on the cake. She could have used it as an excuse (for herself, for her friends, for her husband later on). I find it hard to expect her to ask that guy to stop sending her a monthly "allowance" when it means for her that she could stop work (as he said she did, which many times is not the case) and stay with her family and take care of her son. Or perhaps, as you said, she did not want to throw away her option to have a relationship with that guy if she chose to later on.
I think nobody really knows the true story, and what went on in her mind, or her life, just by reading what the guy wrote on his post.
I totally agree with you about Stickman's comment, for this particular story I also believe it wasn't appropriate, but I'd like to think he was just showing solidarity for the poor guy. I am not reading Stickman regularly, so I'll have to take your word that most stories are complaints about the wrongdoings of Thai women. It doesn't necessarily mean that he has some sort of agenda, though. These are the stories people want to write about when they are upset, and people want to read about as well because it is exciting (sex! money! drugs! clever scams! etc.). I don't think it would be too common for someone to feel like writing about how he got married to his dentist and how they live a happy life, or read about it either, it's a boring story.
Oct 13, 2012 at 10:19 pm
thaiger says
Comes from Isaan,have no education,take care baby(ies) alone with no help whatsoever not even a child welfare,poor family.In fact i dont know even 1 bar girl who hasnt problems like that unfortunately.
But one thing that is really annoying and sad is that people all over the world unfortunately have a bad image about Thailand.I give you an example: just search,look on internet,forums,youtube for a word thai girl.Everytime when you put word thai girl it comes along with a word prostitute.
It really sad becouse of some people who visit Thailand and 99% of time spend in red light district and come back home and post wanker videos,posts about every thai lady is a prostitute,you should not trust them,they take you money etc.Its just stupid and moronic,its like going to amsterdam and talk every girl from Netherland is a prostitute.
There are billions of streets in Thailand,does really couple of street make country look bad. Its really sad to hear if you mention thai girl somebody have to mantion word prostitute.Some people dont understand that there are millions of millions of normal thai girls in thailand so why looking for a prostitute.If you want to find a good girl dont look in a bad place.
sorry for my english as im not a native speaker:-P
Sep 22, 2012 at 6:10 pm
TheThailandLife says
Sep 23, 2012 at 10:44 am
vanesssa says
I just want to share some of my knowledge about the prostitution thing in Thailand. I have a bestfriend there who is working in an office. She was relocated there from Singapore because of requirement in Phuket office. She lived very well here in our country(not SG). I can say that she doesn't need to work but she chose to because she is a professional and wanted to see the world. I can consider her as rich as some falang who do travel a lot and lived with extravagance in every country. She consider relocation there because her brother has business there. blah blah..
She shared to me one thing she knows about the staffs in her office. She found out that a group of staffs in her office is also engaged in the bar scene and confirmed that they go to the bar every night after office and some are "freelance" there who has private transactions with falang and many has regular allowance from their falang boyfriend. She also investigated this. And since then we try to figure out why they are doing these things since they have a DECENT income in the company she is also working at. I have to say that your blog helps a lot to help me understand the pressure that these girls are facing in their society. But at some point it still leaves me some confusion and just want to take it from there until I find my own internal understanding with the whole "bar scene". Thanks a lot.
Aug 31, 2012 at 2:52 pm
TheThailandLife says
Aug 31, 2012 at 3:37 pm
Vincent Siow says
Aug 20, 2012 at 3:45 pm
Lynn says
Jul 05, 2012 at 4:22 am
TheThailandLife says
Jul 05, 2012 at 12:36 pm
Kee Nok says
As everyone can agree it's a complex issue. But lets break it down into two groups and reasons.
Buyer- Anyone who is willing to pay for temporary or extended companionship
Want: Someone to talk/wipe their ass/sex up/clean their house/learn thai* (BS)
Risk: losing sight of a normal relationship, getting a STD, getting robbed, spending all their money.
Seller- Anyone willing to engage in sexual acts for money.
Want: More money. Wanting more money has either increased or decreased their standard of living personally or as a family.
For instance: A Brown bar girl from Isaan that works on Soi Cow Boy and is reasonably attractive/young could make 3,000 or more baht a day on average. That's already doubling the wage of a college graduate without rich connections.
A pale tofu skinned, scared of the sun, university student, model could make 10,000 baht or more a day screwing old rich Thai dudes.
If anything someone should teach the girls that choose to go into the line of risky work how to preserve their commodity they sell by not eating bad food, and working out.
Risk: STD, Debt to the pimp/bar, meaningful relationship
Bottom line. If people stopped buying chicken the market would stop selling chicken.
Since this is a realistic world of people that engage in desire (anything you don't need to live) it will not happen. If you do not gamble you will not die, if you do not have sex you will not die, if you do not drink you will not die, yet we all die so it's your choice in how you use your body. All I'm asking is to please shower if you eat curry every day. A hot Thai bus with a back of Bangladesh workers on it smells the same as if you lit a bag of hair and a used baby diaper on fire.
Monopolies exist in Thailand. Just ask any "Thai" you meet with a long Sanskrit name, they'll tell you the same.
A good friend of mine is college educated in the US, and she's trying to get a job in Bangkok selling BMW cars. They will pay her 7,000 baht a month plus commission. She hopes to earn around 30k baht a month. She turned down a job recently selling 20 million baht apartments that paid 20k baht flat with commission.
She's smart and educate, but she mainly got the job offers for being pale and young, she knows this. A side from all this, single women get paid more then married women in Thailand. Why? Because if the business owner can find a way to pay you less they will.
People's desires get them into trouble. Sadly that's all people have to live on, if they are not taught by them self or others how to ask questions to themselves and their surroundings.
We are all victims of our environment regardless of how good or bad that is. I have a very rich Thai** friend living here that's single and 37 years old. You know how hard it is for her to find a husband? Her family will only let her marry someone that has more money then her. Most Thai guys that have more money then her are too busy paying 5,000 baht a go with a FHM model. She's screwed.
At the end of the day the "Buyer" and "Seller" make their own decisions and take their own risks. In Thailand, if you don't have connections for a good job and you want more money then the market is willing to pay you, you get lucky or take a higher risk.
P.S. Burmese day laborers make around 200-300 baht a day you can live on that in Thailand but you will sleep in a shack, get dark skin and clauses. No one will want to marry you so you can sit on the sofa eating candy watching soap operas... Oops did I just write that?? Oh well, I'm sticking with it.
Keep up the good work on the blog!
May 11, 2012 at 1:22 am
TheThailandLife says
In a way the bar girls are the more privileged of the industry. Many from poor areas are bought and resold very young in Korea, Japan, China and in brothels in thailand where they barely see the light of day. I was only reading today that the industry is morphing; the demand is so high now for whiter skin girls in thailand - because northern Thai girls aren't going into the industry as much as they once did, yes the north was the hub of prostitution in Thailand before the Isaan invasion - that more women are trafficked into Thailand from poor parts of Southern China than Thais going into the industry domestically.
So I ask my fellow white europeans/westerners, are we to continue propping up what is at the core a cruel, pernicious and misanthropic industry, and continue to plough money into funding the pimps, the mafia, the aristocracy and all the others who benefit from the exploitation of what is largely the marginalised, underprivileged, rural poor, who bewilderedly follow a superficial dream of money and respect = elevation of face and family, or do choose to do something positive.
Shame on us.
May 12, 2012 at 12:30 am
nicolas says
That's nice article very idealistic and bit self righteous too. I wouldn't judge the old farts going over there too as I am not old yet.
It's easy and big money for most of them so some go for it but some don't. they are free.
Go to Europe, see the prostitution over there, that's slavery and mafia involved, tha'ts disgusting. Get offended about that, its real
Apr 08, 2012 at 9:16 am
bibblies says
By the way, why do so many farang women live here now and why so many farang men who don't come here for the p4p choose to live here, I wonder?
Think about it. A lot of them will be living here mainly because it's easy and ...
... it's CHEAP.
In other words, they take advantage of the lower cost of living here. Curiously they don't worry about the wages of the shop workers as they go around the malls or the security guards in their apartment blocks. They don't think too much about the wages of the masseuses in the legimate massage places, the wages in any restaurants or any local places they take advantage of on a daily basis. They also don't think about the effect of more farangs living there pushing up housing prices. Of course they don't think about any of this... they want costs to stay low... they're taking advantage as much (and perhaps more) as any guy indulging in p4p.
Apr 12, 2012 at 11:23 pm
jackman says
Mar 19, 2012 at 7:10 pm
TheThailandLife says
Mar 19, 2012 at 8:01 pm
bibblies says
"Som nam na". An old guy has been conned out of his life savings. And he's old, he's got no working life left, no chance to start again. And you laugh?
Why? Because he succumbed to emotions or because he was so concerned with sex after maybe a hard life? That's such a bad thing that the guy deserves to lose all his worldly goods and future? And the girl's behaviour is OK in your eyes?
Now I'm not this guy's age - I'm much closer to yours - but, for me, you saying the easy "som nam na" here is pretty much like saying "som nam na" to a gay guy who's slept around and got HIV/AIDS. That guy would have been where he was through his love of sex and own irresponsible behaviour but he doesn't deserve something of that magnitude to happen to him in my opinion and I bet you wouldn't say "som nam na" there.
Apr 12, 2012 at 11:14 pm
chiboy says
Sep 12, 2012 at 1:21 am
bibblies says
I don't see anyone 'justifying' being around prostitutes. That would need posts saying things like "I stay with prostitutes because..." and I don't see any like that, just (mostly) intelligent comments around what the blogger wrote (which wasn't "Why do you consort with prostitutes?") The reason why you don't see these posts is because no one cares about 'justifying' these things. They're all long past that. No one even thought of it until you came into the picture with your Victorian Dad oddness.
Mar 07, 2012 at 12:05 am
Patrick S says
Mar 04, 2012 at 3:42 pm
bibblies says
Mar 05, 2012 at 4:05 am
Patrıck S says
Mar 06, 2012 at 4:14 pm