You will find a huge amount of misleading information online regarding Sin Sod, and conflicting experiences can be found plastered all over forums and blogs.
So, when a foreigner wants to marry his Thai girlfriend and the inevitable subject of Sin Sod arises, it is no surprise that he becomes confused over what he should be paying and why he is expected to pay it.
Part of the problem is that Thai women often don’t explain the concept of Sin Sod very well, which isn’t at all surprising, considering that for them it’s a standard tradition and an age-old part of Thai culture.
They just get on with it. It's normal. They've seen it a hundred times at weddings since childhood. And like traditions the world over, some people simply participate and follow along without really understanding the history.
I'm married myself, and I've been to a few Thai weddings in my time. But of course, if we want to know the truth about Sin Sod, the best people to ask are Thai people themselves. So for this post, to make sure my understanding is accurate, I enlisted a couple of Thai friends to help me stay on point.
Before I begin, I am not by any means saying that the information in this post is entirely definitive or one hundred percent historically factual.
However, what I can say is that the information is the experience of myself and two Thai people, both educated and well-versed in their own culture.
Contents
What Is Sin Sod?
Sin Sod is paid to the bride's parents. It is a repayment for the investment they have put into raising their daughter, and also for the loss incurred by their daughter not being readily available to support them anymore.
It is also symbolic of the groom's ability to be able to financially take care of the bride.
Sin Sod is a very significant part of the Thai marriage tradition, and something most families take seriously. However, not all families keep the money, and in the modern day it is often returned.
The Three Components of the “Thai Dowry”
To break the meaning down further, there are generally three reasons for the payment of Sin Sod, as follows:
1. Traditionally, the eldest unmarried daughter takes care of her parents until she gets married, and therefore the Sin Sod in some respects replaces that income for the parents. As you might know, it is common for a single Thai woman to send a portion of her salary to her parents each month.
This usually stops once she is married and has her children to care for.
So, as you can imagine, for parents with no pension plan and little savings, the Sin Sod is a much-needed payday.
Richer families, who don't need the money, usually return the money because, quite simply, they don’t need it. For them, Sin Sod is more about showing status.
2. Once a woman has been married, and/or has kids, the structure of Thai society makes it very hard for her to find a man of decent stature. Therefore, the Sin Sod acts as a sort of insurance in the event that the husband leaves and doesn't offer post-separation financial support.
The bottom line is, if a woman finds herself back living with her parents as a single mother, the Sin Sod insures that there will be some money/land in the family to support the family.
Thai society also dictates that the older a Thai woman gets the harder it becomes for her to find a job, let alone a well-paid one. So again, should she find herself alone in the future, at least the family will have some money put by for some inevitably rainy years ahead.
As you can see, marriage is actually somewhat of a risk for a young woman.
3. Where poorer families are concerned, Sin Sod is considered repayment for the money invested in their daughter. Many families sell land, borrow money and generally go without to put their kids through university, or in some cases to simply put food on the table.
The Sin Sod is essentially a repayment for that investment. The amount paid for Sin Sod could be considered relative to the sacrificial cost of bringing up the child – thus the reason it is often referred to as payment for the “mother's milk”.
What Sin Sod Isn't
Some refer to Sin Sod as a dowry, but to be clear, you are not buying a woman or approaching her family to buy her.
The Western-centric viewpoint that Sin Sod equates to the purchasing of a Thai bride is completely incorrect.
To fully understand the tradition, I think it pays (pardon the pun) to put the word “dowry” out of your mind, not least because any suggestion to your future in-laws that you are purchasing their daughter will be very offensive.
Who Pays Sin Sod?
Any man marrying a Thai woman is expected to pay Sin Sod.
The amount is usually agreed between the two families. Where a foreigner's parents aren't present, the duty falls on him to ask the family how much they expect.
Who Doesn’t Pay Sin Sod?
In the modern day, many families don’t expect Sin Sod, and many will tell the boyfriend that they don’t want any money. Indeed, many young Thai women are now rejecting the tradition because of its outdated meaning.
However, it is very rare that money isn’t shown at the wedding, albeit that it might be returned.
It should be noted that to expect the money back, or to ask for it back, is unacceptable. One will be offered it back if that is to be the case.
Also note that you may not be required to pay Sin Sod if the woman you are marrying has been married before. See the section below for more details.
How Much Should You Pay for Sin Sod?
Historically this has (generally) depended on six factors, as listed and discussed below:
- Family Name
- Education
- Prior Marital Status
- Dependents
- Employment
- Age
1. Family Name
If your girlfriend is from a well-to-do family, you could be looking at a fair lump sum. However, in this situation the money will most likely be for show and returned to you after the wedding.
2. Education
If your girlfriend is university educated or beyond, then it is likely that you will be looking at a minimum of around 300,000 Baht. This is a low-moderate amount by modern-day Thai standards.
For example, a friend at my girlfriend’s workplace is soon to marry a Thai lady of a high-school level education and he is paying 200,000 Baht. His salary is approximately 30,000 per month.
3. Prior Marital Status
If your girlfriend has been married before then you should pay less. You might argue – on grounds of tradition – that you shouldn’t be paying at all. However, as a respectful gesture, you should offer something.
Remember that marriage is intended to happen once in Thai culture, and therefore importance is emphasized on marrying for the first time.
Unlike second and third marriages in the west, which may be seen as equally as important and “true love” matches, in Thailand they are not that much of a big deal. Celebrity second and third marriages are the exception to this rule.
4. Dependents
If your girlfriend has kids, tradition dictates that you should pay less.
This stems from the age-old thinking that the woman is tainted in some way, already given to another man, so to speak.
You will become responsible for another man’s seed, and for that you shouldn’t be paying for the privilege.
5. Employment
In terms of a woman's employment, it's hierarchical and usually correlates with education and earnings. For example, you'd pay/show more to marry a banker than a cleaner.
6. Age
Age is a contentious and quite horrible issue when it comes to Sin Sod.
I mean, when ex childhood superstar singer Tata Young, at almost 40 years old married Prame, the son of the FairTex boxing brand owner, she commanded 100 million Baht Sin Sod.
But for a 40-year-old woman from a poor rural family and a few kids in tow, it's unlikely that more than 200,000 Baht would be on offer.
That said, the type of guys such a woman would have access to wouldn't be able to afford more than that anyway.
But who knows, occasionally a rich man does fall for a poorer woman in good old classist Thailand, and to show his wealth he would no doubt slap down a hefty sin sod.
Age comes fairly low down on the list, though, and Sin Sod is generally decided by status, family wealth, family name and accomplishment/education of the female in question.
Want to know what I think you should pay? Leave your circumstances in the comments section and I'll give you my estimate!
My Girlfriend Is Asking For Too Much!
Many foreigners find themselves in this position, and it isn’t necessarily that your girlfriend is trying to con you, more so that she is trying to secure higher face for her family, and in some cases to elevate her family's wealth.
Face is everything in Thai society. To marry a foreigner with a Sin Sod of less than 200,000 Baht would be quite a loss of face – not just for her but also for you!
The fact that she is marrying a foreigner will mean tongues start wagging in the village.
So when you say:
“What! No way! I am not paying to marry you”
Or you announce a payment less than what an average Thai guy earning 10-15k a month would pay, you get branded a “Farang kee-nock” (literally translated as bird shit foreigner, but refers to a poor, lower class foreigner), or “Keniiow” (stingy).
The folks in the village will have a good laugh:
“Why is she marrying a foreigner when he can’t afford to pay anymore than one of us folk”?
Yes, unfortunately most Thais believe, as many westerners do, that Thai women only marry foreigners for financial security, unless of course the Thai woman is richer or as wealthy as the foreigner.
Ask Her Parents
Anyway, don't take your girlfriend’s word for it, because the tradition is that you are supposed to ask the mother and father for the amount they want. It is not for the woman to tell the man what she wants. So arrange to meet with the parents and politely ask them what they expect.
They will probably say one of two things:
1. “Oh no, mai pen rai. We don’t want anything”.
2. “It's up to you”.
The first answer doesn’t mean you say, “Okay, great”, and go and buy a new car instead.
By answering in this way they are exercising their “grengjai”. They are being polite.
What they actually mean is:
“Tell us what you WANT to pay, and you will be able to tell by our body language whether we think it’s okay or not”.
So basically you need to make out you really want to pay. As you can see, this all falls in nicely with the non-confrontational Thai style.
The second answer means, “What do you want to pay… but don’t insult me”!
*It should be noted that some families might genuinely want nothing at all.
Will You Get Your Money Back?
Chances are that you might, actually. Though don't expect it.
Interestingly, there was a poll Pantip, the popular Thai website, that surveyed a number of readers, asking whether their families returned the money.
48 out of 75 families said they returned the Money. Ten families returned only some of the money. And 17 families didn’t return any money.
All This Talk of Money Seems So Shallow!
Yes, and for the most part it is.
Sin Sod is largely about face.
“Look at my daughter, she went to university and married a good man with a good job”.
Or even, “Look at my daughter, she didn’t go to university, but she is so beautiful and hardworking that she married a lovely rich foreign guy”.
As a foreigner, you may feel like you are buying your girlfriend and have become a victim of the old “Thailand ATM” syndrome. And depending on the circumstances, that could be the case.
But if you're in a secure, genuine relationship, you need to forget what the misinformed barstool gossips say and consider your girlfriend and the culture. And yes, that's right, she too needs to consider your wallet.
Like it or not, Sin Sod is a big part of Thai culture, and, as soon as a Thai woman announces marriage, the big question on everyone's lips is, “How much Sin Sod“?
Why?
Because Sin Sod is a reflection of her and her family and you and your family.
A Thai woman lives to make her family proud, to show the other villagers that they are a good family, that they are to be respected, and that they are climbing the social scale.
I Feel I'm Compromising My Western Culture
I hear you.
I come from a culture where the woman’s father is supposed to pay all the wedding costs, though it’s more a 50-50 thing in the modern day.
But think about it like this: Your girlfriend has probably already sacrificed many of her cultural traditions to accommodate you in her life. Living with you and sleeping with you before marriage are two of those sacrifices.
Without you knowing it, she will have been the talk of her village for living with you without being married – this reflects badly on her family.
Don’t forget that you chose her as your girlfriend, and with all due respect, before getting involved with a woman from another culture, you really should understand the culture first.
On an emotional level, you need to consider that just like every Western girl dreams of a white wedding to make her daddy proud, the majority of Thai women grow up dreaming of marrying in their home town and making their parents proud with a respectable Sin Sod, and in turn elevating the family face.
The way I see it is this: An average wedding in the UK costs £20,000. So if you pay £4,000 – £6,000 to marry your Thai girlfriend in a village ceremony that costs no more than £2,000, you still save a whopping £12,000!
That said, in the UK, you get gifts and money from your girlfriend’s family, so that does offset some of the cost.
You also get money in Thailand. Guests put money in a box on their way in. We clocked up about 15,000 Baht if I remember correctly. That was a pleasant surprise.
Truth be told, you aren’t likely to get much in return at any point unless you marry into a wealthy family, but then setting up home here is cheaper, as is taking care of a woman post-marriage.
In Summary
Sin Sod isn't a recent cultural scam made up to dupe foreigners out of their savings; it has been around for donkey's years and is an expected part of every Thai wedding, although not everyone adhere's to the tradition.
Is it outdated? Probably.
Are some Thai brides using the tradition to extort older foreign men and secure a windfall for their family? A few. Where there is money to be made there is always someone seeking to exploit a situation.
In a nutshell, it is important for a foreign national marrying a Thai to understand this tradition, to know its symbolic meaning and what a fair Sin Sod is in a given circumstance.
That doesn't mean you have to agree with it, but whether you like it or not, marriage is about compromise – because it involves two people – so do your best to find some middle ground that makes both you and your partner feel comfortable.
Or, just call the whole thing off!
Feel free to pitch in with your experience. It would be really useful to know what married guys paid, or didn’t pay, and how the process was handled.
I would like to say a big thanks to Marisa and Noynar for contributing their cultural knowledge to help me write this post.
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Michael says
Today, we talked about Sin Sod. I can understand on the dowry- 300,000 baht (which she mentioned her parents would normally return to me and is just a form if formality) and the jewellery that we are discussing.
But when she mentioned that because she be moving to my country to stay with me, she and her family would expect that i have my house to be under her name for a sense of security towards her family letting them know that i am capable of taking care of her daughter financially and because she is responsible for taking care of our children (in future).
To me this is something that is over as it is not a culture practice on my end.
Moreover i try to search on Sin Sod but i don't see anything that sayimg about housing is part of it.
Please advise on this as i am confused when i hear this from her.
Nov 12, 2017 at 12:31 am
TheThailandLife says
Nov 12, 2017 at 4:03 am
Jeffrey says
Dec 08, 2017 at 9:05 am
Jack says
I gave her 350,000 to refinance the loan she took out for her parents house. I pledged to give them 100,000 baht per year so that she wouldn't worry so much about them.
During the first year of marriage, she had to wait for a work permit, so I paid about 300,000 baht against her loans.
The next year, she worked, but she paid nothing for our expenses -- all of her earnings was sent home. I gave her parents the 100,000 and also gave my wife about 200,000 because she had some other debt turn up she didn't know about.
In the third year of our marriage, she started having an affair with a 60 year old Filipino immigrant who was a supervisor at her job.
I asked her to stop her affair and quit her job. She said she dumped him because she didn't want me to divorce her. She lied. She continued to see him, making excuses to work nights when she didn't have to, saying she couldn't take a vacation with me when she could have -- lots of lies like that.
So I kicked her out. I will divorce her.
In all, I gave her over 1 million baht cash to pay her debts and the loan on her parents home. I paid for her travel between US and Thailand for 3 trips. I paid all of her living expenses.
It didn't matter. She didn't love me. There are no refunds. Be careful, my friends.
Oct 25, 2017 at 10:15 am
TheThailandLife says
Oct 25, 2017 at 4:11 pm
Phil says
She was previously married and has two daughters aged 15 and 17.
She left her abusive husband and fled with her girls to a friend’s house, and lived with her for about a year or so. The husband died shortly afterwards. She has no parents and works as a cleaner in a local government office earning 9k baht per month, and I send money every month to augment her income for her upkeep, and for her daughters’ education.
We plan to get married in August 2019, and today she mentioned Sin Sot for the first time (which is why I searched this topic!).
We discuss money quite openly, and as I am on only 25k a year, the current arrangements of visiting Thailand so often and sending housekeeping, mean I don’t have a great deal of dosh to throw around.
The paradox is that, when I retire, I will get more money each month than I do now, and as far as safeguarding her future is concerned, I have insurances for when I croak (and she is the only beneficiary).
When she mentioned the Sin Sot, she did say that it will be returned to HER after the ceremony. Now don’t get me wrong – I love my fiancé to utter distraction, and we have a very real and loving relationship. Her family and friends have welcomed me unreservedly and we are a really happy bunch together.
But I just feel that, as I am looking after her so much now, and making sure her future is secure, why would she think it’s necessary for me to struggle to find even more dosh?
Oct 25, 2017 at 2:09 am
TheThailandLife says
Oct 25, 2017 at 4:16 pm
Phil says
I will be going to live in Thailand when I retire, and am already looking at types of houses, house prices, and the areas where we can live.
I have given her a lot of jewellery – a gold necklace, 2 bracelets (a gold one and a silver one), a gold watch and not least a gold ring :)
I have given both her daughters gold necklaces which they put away carefully and only wear for special occasions, and two watches each – one for everyday use and one for special. They are utterly beautiful young ladies - outside and inside – and call me Phaaw Mai (New Father).
I am absolutely sure that she is not taking the Pee, but I suspect she likes showing off at work and with her family and friends that she has landed a western bloke who loves and cares for her. That is no problem for me :)
Every time I go to Thailand I take small gifts for her family and friends. Thornton’s chocolates are the favourites! And we always have a big family and friends evening out during my stay. It is thoroughly enjoyable to relax with them, quaff a few Changs and have a good dinner. The atmosphere is always incredible :)
In light of your remarks, maybe she wants to show off just a little bit more with the sin sod?
Oct 27, 2017 at 2:05 am
richard says
As she had never ever asked me for anything nor had her family I was lucky enough to see this article and searched other articles to guide my western minded thoughts in the right direction.
My initial reaction was to say no. This was after having listened for many years to the jaded treat em mean bar flies who are so ready to offer you their knowledge .
Believe me if you don't want to piss off your g/f, embarrass her and her family and also make yourself look mean then pay a minimal amount as I did.
We agreed that I would pay the 2ook but I insisted that except in any emergency that was it....a one off payment.
From now on I said that our earnings were for us as a family not her parents. ( they have a small shop and earnings enough.).
They understood this and have been true to the agreement.
This way they save face and feel good about their daughter, your wife feels happy and respects you more for it.,and you don't come across as a complete shit in your wife's village. .and you will get to reap the benefits in your relationship..
Oct 18, 2017 at 11:19 pm
Dave says
About her:
-University education
-27
-no kids, not married as far as i know
-Old job was high position of famous car company (200 people leader)
-family is middle class
Now my question is 1 mill fair or maybe even not enough? i wouldnt question this number if she didnt mention the 10mill before which is just ridiculous obviously.
And something else, how to make her not want to live with her mom in the future as i can not live like their culture with our parents in same home, i need to live with her and our future kids and that's it.
Thanks for the advices
Oct 05, 2017 at 9:44 pm
TheThailandLife says
Oct 05, 2017 at 10:01 pm
Dave says
I say live together with her mom as she stated thats her dream she wants to bring her later too once we have established a home, which i disagree strongly and fighted over it, now we’ve decided to let this decision discuss later once we reach the point of living together but mainly she knows i wont live with her mom together. I know i do sound mean as she lost her dad early and mom is not all she has got but she’s very close to her and i understand her points but with her having around is 0 privacy and definately how i imagined my life once i live with her together.
Nonetheless i dont wanna lose her as i love her deeply and thus maybe advise how to solve this in a good way
Oct 05, 2017 at 10:09 pm
Andy says
That's all I can afford . I understand cultures , but western culture is that the girls parents help out with wedding cost . That won't be happening as they don't have much to start with .
I don't believe this will be the last time I help out with money . Don't see why you'd start married life of skint by giving all your money away .
Your going to need about £2000 for a wedding visa to get her back home with you aswell . All money money .
Sep 17, 2017 at 4:33 am
TheThailandLife says
Sep 18, 2017 at 5:01 pm
Dave says
I say live together with her mom as she stated thats her dream she wants to bring her later too once we have established a home, which i disagree strongly and fighted over it, now we've decided to let this decision discuss later once we reach the point of living together but mainly she knows i wont live with her mom together. I know i do sound mean as she lost her dad early and mom is not all she has got but she's very close to her and i understand her points but with her having around is 0 privacy and definately how i imagined my life once i live with her together.
Nonetheless i dont wanna lose her as i love her deeply and thus maybe advise how to solve this in a good way
Oct 05, 2017 at 10:09 pm
Rondo says
I have recently started talking to a 36 year old lady from the Isan region. She is much different then I expected of any woman from Thailand but, with that said she shares the same common thread, the same typical....American/ Foreigner has more money and can give her a better life then the one she currently has.
She has this innocent quality about her. Very attentive, caring, big -hearted, lives and wants to provide for her parents (oldest child/ Daughter). She genuinely seems to care about me (here comes the "but"), but when it comes to her thoughts on money related matters, I guess like a lot of Americans who have dealt with the greedy nature of American women, I'm a bit suspicious.
She has made me aware of Sin Sod from the very first week I met her and suggested I read about Thai customs, which I found as an endearing quality, she was upfront with me. As of lately though I am again feeling a little out of sorts.
Again She is 36 but gorgeous, she is divorced from a Thai man and her last relationship before me was with an Englishman who I'd assume she met in Udon Thani. She has no kids, no college education and comes from a farming family. She works her butt off (basically 3 jobs at a market, as a Nanny and her families farm), takes care of everything for her parents, plus takes care of her Nephew and his College education.
She just told me if I want her to come to the US with me, I would have to commit to taking care of her family financially approximately 25000 baht a month. I understand what she does and means to her family and I obviously know if she's in the States with me she wouldn't be working at first or for sometime. I again, obviously wouldn't want her family to suffer in her absence.
What other then helping as she asks could I do? A Sin Sod amount has not been discussed at all and now she is asking for financial support so she can cut back a bit and not have to work so hard?
Anyone deal with a similar situation?
Any advice?
I'm concerned, feel like I could be getting scammed but that could be my suspicious nature talking.
She genuinely doesn't seem like that type to me hence my confusion.
Sep 12, 2017 at 11:53 am
TheThailandLife says
Sep 15, 2017 at 5:54 pm
Chris says
Point is, she is the one for me. These kind of women are out there, but they are NOT any easier to find than in your own country. Get off your butt and really put some hard effort into not just settling with the first piece of tail that makes things feel all right and then talks money. That is what Go Go bars are for. Seriously, I agree with the article author, and at 25,000BT per month, you can have a new gik [=temp gf for fun/companionship/sex/etc] every 2-3 days/month who is not a street girl.
As an aside, case in point, true story, etc.....we met some mutual friends of my girlfriend that accompanied us to a nice rooftop club atop the Sofitel Hotel in central downtown Bangkok overlooking Lumpini Park (kind of like the Central Park of New York, but for Bangkok [BKK]). I give the specifics on this to establish these are not country girls, but university educated [verified] working girls. One of the girls who came along asked my girlfriend if I had any friends I could introduce her to. I did, and I made the introduction over my phone live via Skype with college mate of mine. My long-time friend from college was smitten. He was doing video chat with her everyday. She thanked me for setting her up. I said 'cool.' My girlfriend shrugged her shoulders at me knowing something I didn't, but when I pressed her, she told me to wait and see... That she did not want to say anything bad about the situation. I was like hmm, but I did not say anything to my friend who is a grown-up and can take care of himself. Long story short, he thought she was hot, attentive, etc. Within three weeks, things soured. Friend comes back to tell me she was saying that she needed him to prove he was 'serious' in that she needed him to send her money to 'take care of my parents if I go out with you.' I told my gf who let out a big frowning sigh, and said to tell my friend to block her. I was like wtf is going on? My gf basically had told this female acquaintance I hooked my friend up with to lay off the money talk until she at least met him in person (he was in the USA at the time, and had never been to Thailand). Apparently, she did not listen. In the end, my friend did block her, she tried to contact me, my gf took my phone and blocked her, and my gf did the same on her phone. She then warned my friend to avoid any further contact with her which he took her advice and did. She said, some girls do not deserve nice guys. My friend is loaded [owns two apartment complexes]. My gf knew it and regretted chatting about it with this acquaintance, but she said the only way this girl deserves him is to be nice and let things play out. In the end, this girl really lost out big because my friend would have definitely flown out to meet her and moved things forward in natural order. So the take home lesson, both from my experience and from my friend's experience, avoid ANY girl like the plague who talks about money. As a funny billboard you can google says, 'all women have vaginas, find one with a brain.'
Now, in all fairness, even though my gf has NEVER asked me for money, I got her covered to the hilt; BUT, it did not start until I CHOSE TO DO SO after a year of dating and seeing her three times in Thailand. Again, never once did she ever ask or hint at me. When we went out together, I did take care of everything from meals, places to stay, etc. I felt like a rock star with her, and never once did she ask for money. If anything, she raided my phone all the time demanding my passwords to see if I was talking to other girls. Having a hot girl who was jealous on you was not something I was used to, but it was a good problem [for me, at least] to have. Why? Cause she kicks the crap of ANYTHING I could ever get back in the States [never married, no kids, age 28, not a bar girl, educated, porn star behind closed doors, fiercely loyal and demands same, does not play games with your heart]. This is why I am hooked on her. She practices what she preaches and I would kill myself if I lost her. I can say with EXTREME PREJUDICE, avoid Thai women who talk money and ANY like them [their friends, etc]. Thailand has MANY good women who are educated and WOULD NEVER lean on you or your money. The educated city girls even scoff at the farang guys who think that any Thai woman will throw themselves at their feet merely by assuming all Thai women want a marriage visa to another country. Trust me, rich chics of ANY country have NO INCENTIVE to leave their country if the ENDS are meeting ALL ON THEIR OWN. If they do ask you for money, and you fall for it, you DESERVE every bad thing that ever happens to you from that point on. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I cannot stress this enough. WALK AWAY from ANY GIRL who talks to you about money. You should be the only one to initiate or continue financial arrangements with NO STRINGS ATTACHED. Punani with money attached to it is called PROSTITUTION. If you are going to go that route, go to the GoGo bars and have your pick of the litter and be on with it. BUT....if you come to really love a winner of a woman, then you will do take care of finances naturally because you want to take care of your woman, and they, like my girl, will never have to ask. Just my .02 cents.
Oct 01, 2017 at 11:11 am
gino says
Sep 10, 2017 at 10:32 am
TheThailandLife says
Sep 10, 2017 at 5:14 pm
sean siu says
is it possible to reason with these thais with out them losing face if im not willing to pay for the sin sod ?????
Aug 11, 2017 at 4:42 am
TheThailandLife says
Aug 11, 2017 at 5:21 pm
petra martina says
Aug 14, 2017 at 12:59 am
Alpha says
Nov 15, 2017 at 6:07 am
Kytriya says
2. She was married before, which in Thai culture already declares a lesser amount.
3. Her brother is asking for money - gold. This was never apart of the custom that I can find anywhere. I can't remember what a Thai exchange student told me long ago.
4. She has a child from another man's seed, which in Thai culture also says that less money should be given. All this says that her wanting so much money is a scam! I would run and never look back. I wonder what happened to her first husband and why her parents are dead.
OTOH, I don't know how rich you are. And, I can see how brother might be taking care of his future because no parents. Is he basing this on the "I am now the head of the household, so I became the parents and thus I should get money" type of thinking? Is this even a thing in Thailand? If so, I can grace it a little more, but the amount is still way too high.
Also I can see how she might be somewhat scared about her future because she has a 14 yr old and no husband. I don't know if her ex left her with a lot of debt or not.
I used to go to school with a Thai Exchange student way back in the day. I can't remember what she said about siblings in the case of parents dying prematurely. Even so, this amount seems way too high! 1 million baht plus gold says that you are a very wealthy man and they know it. Unrealistic amount for the reasons I stated.
Aug 22, 2017 at 10:33 am
sean siu says
thanks for your reply i have learn a lot form the points you pointed out i would like to tell you how i met her . i was introduced by casual dressed taxi guys, who ever walk by them they always want (foreigners)to them a tour around floating market which at the of place they take them to they will earn commission from the event verdes.
Sep 14, 2017 at 5:15 am
Mark says
She is 34, has one child, divorced some high school education and staying current with her parents in a village. I would not say that they are well off.
How much Sin Sod should I be paying?
Aug 11, 2017 at 2:26 am
TheThailandLife says
Aug 11, 2017 at 5:28 pm